Day 9 - The estrogen limbo

My estrogen level has dropped again to 1200. I don't have a clue how or why this has happened. I don't think it is normal - could this affect the quality of my eggs? The ultrasound showed that my 14mm follicle has grown to 22mm in the pas three days, so maybe that follicle is absorbing all of my gonal-f? I do have about 8 other follicles growing between 5-9mm each. Can follicles collapse? I'm hoping that the 22mm follicle will collapse, allowing the other follicles to start soaking up the FSH and grow! Seriously, how can I go from being overstiulated al the time, to going backwards!

Off to the hospital tomorrow for another blood test to see where we are at. I'm worried that this cycle is a bust already, but I so badly just want to get to egg collection and transfer that I am willing to go ahead even if the conditions aren't perfect. I'm not sure I will ever get a 'textbook' IVF cycle - damn it!

Still highly emotional at the moment. Two of my girlfriends have just seperated from their husbands, and a mate has broken up with his long term girlfriend of five years. Another friend has been to two funerals this week for people at work. Everything just seems to be collapsing, and I can feel my grip on 'normalcy' slowly slipping away. My poor veins aren't doing too flash either - four bloodtests in a row is plenty enough to make my veins shrivel up and hide everytime the phleb comes close to me with a needle.

Oh well, it is the weekend thank goodness. I am sitting in my Economics lecture theatre waiting for my lecturer to arrive and spend the next three hours going over macroeconomic theory - oh the torture. The one good news that I received today is that I got 100% on my midsemester Accounting exam I did last weekend! My first ever 100% result and in a subject I find quite difficult, so that has given me a little bit of my wind back this afternoon. Hopefully it is a good omen!

Have a great weekend everyone!