Waiting some more

On the 29th November our adoption profile went live. We are coming up to four months in approved applicant pool.

Surprisingly it hasn’t been too difficult just yet. I would go so far to say that it has been a blessing not to have been selected at this stage. I am weeks away from having worked for my employer for 12 months, which will entitle me to workplace maternity leave (28 weeks at half pay), on top of the federal governments maternity leave (18 weeks at minimum wage, which is around the equivalent of half pay). That will mean I can take at least 46 weeks off while still covering all of the bills and mortgage.

In the first month after putting our profile up, I went into crazy preparation mode. I put together the change table, cleared out the spare room, considered colours for the nursery walls, and became baby obsessed. That dissipated quickly as I realised that I wanted to take my time and enjoy this period of waiting. This isn’t a race. We will get the child that we are meant to have, and that doesn’t necessarily mean the first child that is up for placement. All in God’s timing. But that means learning to be patient and that has never been a strength of mine. This isn’t something that I can ‘achieve’; something I can plan, work hard at and then get as a prize at the end of it. I have to relinquish control. I am learning to do that more and more each day.

Murray and I are happy. Things are great in our lives, we have no complaint or quarrel. Having a child would bring so much more to our lives, but even as a family of two, we are good. For now.